Day 218 - January 18 - Big Bad Brad to the rescue
I watched the comments of the "7m +1d = 2long" thread with interest - after different points I'd feel a bit miffed, then a bit mollified - and I was planning on posting this post tonight with the desire to make sure we remain the blogchurch we want to be. One where everyone feels welcome to journey along with us, and not one where folks were reprimanded for speaking their hearts. When I got to the computer to do so, however, I found that Brad had once again stepped in (like the big brother he is) and said what I wanted to say only better. So thanks Brad, for putting out the incipient fire!
In regards to the comments on that thread, I want to answer a few of them briefly, primarily the statements that you only hear from me and it would be good to hear from Connor himself. I agree - Connor will (I assume) someday blog here and tell you his heart and his journey. As of right now, however, he chooses not to do so. I have asked him to do so, and that's all I will do - I will not force him to do so, for that would defeat the purpose. I'll leave it to the Holy Spirit to prompt him to the point where he's comfortable with the idea. And until then, I won't post much about what he's feeling, either, primarily because I'll get it wrong. It's not my place to pour out his heart, or Cherie's, or Joelle's - I can only pour out mine. All three of the others have a standing invitation to blog anytime they desire, and both the girls have done so on occasion. But when they do, it will be completely because they feel led to do it, and not because I want them to. That's the only way their hearts will be heard.
One writer in that thread did put a finger on one of my biggest personal struggles, that of my outlook. I have a propensity to see the glass as half empty, and I also have a temperament that fluctuates wildly, and can border on depression. These last seven months have increased that tendency, and it is difficult for me to keep my viewpoint balanced. It's something God continues to work on in me, so bear with me in that. In fact, I've decided that from now on, I'll only post updates like this -
"Things are fantastic today!!! I can't imagine how things could possibly be better!!! God is so good to us, we just keep getting our socks blessed off left and right!!!! If He was any more wonderful to us, we'd grow flowers out of our backsides!!!!!"
OK, I'm kidding! But I will (continue) to try and stay reasonably balanced, and consistent with my oath to tell the truth about where we are. Hopefully that will suffice.
Finally, I will repeat my plea for identities with your comments. It is easy to throw criticism toward me and my family from behind the veil of anonymity, but it's like sniping from the shadows. I have laid out in plain view everything my heart goes through, setting it in public for the world to see and pick apart. The very least you can do for me in return is to do me the honor of your name when you offer a counterpoint. I don't mind hearing what others think of what's going on - I just want to know who is saying it. The rule of thumb is this - if you would say it to my face, say it as if to my face, where I can see who it is. If you would only say it behind my back, either put your name on it or don't say it at all. If you feel strongly enough about your point of view to believe it, you should back it up with your name. Because quite frankly, if you don't think it's worth putting your name on, is it really worth reading?
So, now that that's all over, here's where we're at tonight - Connor, Cherié and I just got done watching a stupid movie together, laughing and groaning interchangeably depending on how bad the script was. The boy's in bed now after a long day - church, visits with friends, and all our routines. One of the questions we were asked repeatedly today was if Connor's in his new room yet, and the answer is "No". I've sent some photos to Brad for posting, and I'll plan on inundating him with some more tomorrow, but the gist of the story is that we're getting close to move in date. I'll make sure to post up photos and notifications when we do.
Thanks for caring about us and about the boy. Even when we have differing viewpoints, I still covet your prayers and your support. So thank you for being part of the journey with us.
Good night.
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posted by Eric Williamson @ 9:56 PM
16 Comments
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16 Comments:
Eric,
Continue posting what's on your heart, and what you and the family need prayer for. Don't be afraid to let us know what you're struggling with, in light of what some have criticized you with.
How does a Christian family help each other if they don't know what's going on? How would we know when to encourage and when and how to pray? So please keep posting just as you have. We want to come along side of you all with our love, concern, support, encouragement, and most of all, prayer!
We won't stop praying for you all!
Love to you!
Kim & Ken
Dear Eric,
I've been one that has been blessed by your very real sharing of your heart. I agree, here we are, your brothers and sisters and as such we can help carry your burdens. After all,
"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity
under heaven... a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance." Eccl 3:1-4
This is a season of sadness, weeping and mourning at times. Bring it on - we are here for you and can help carry your burdens to the Lord.
God bless you all. Even though I don't post daily, I check on you all so often and I pray for you daily.
Sandi
Gilroy
Eric,
I am proud of you.
Not because you are perfect.
I know you too well to try and convince either of us of that!
Rather, I am proud because you have integrity.
You are honest and real.
It takes courage to be real.
Because sometimes what's real is not pretty.
But it's still real.
Your feelings are real.
Connor's situation is real.
Most of all, God is real.
The great folly of the post-modern world we live in is based on the opposite approach to reality. People attempt to define truth according to their own understanding.
You continue to define truth as truth.
And you do that even when the truth is that you are only human; and you are not the one in charge.
A half-glass is a a half-glass; whether you call it half full or half empty. The reality doesn't change.
The only thing that changes is your perspective; how you perceive what you see.
You refuse to hide behind a facade or to be Pollyanna-like in your countenance.
This blog is an expression of human perspective in the light of God's overarching soverignty. As each of us continues the journey of faith, the level of our understanding changes.
The truth has not changed.
God is the same yesterday, today and forever.
You keep on writing what you feel.
And we will keep on loving you and Cherie' and Joelle and Connor and Jesus.
(and yes...even the anonymous commenters who journey with us)
Love to you all.
Because of Jesus,
Jeff for the Slavich family
Yes...Brad Williamson....awesome way of putting things.
Praying for Connor and family always.
The Rizzi Family in Norco
I have been a quiet reader of your blog for a long time now. I'm not even sure how I came to find your blog but from the moment I first read it I was drawn in by God.
I have been encouraged by your blog, I have been sad, I have been rejoicing. It is a joy to walk this out with you even though I haven't a clue who you are and wouldn't know you if i tripped over you on the street! haha! But God has a way of joining brothers and sisters together and putting one another in each others paths.
I have prayed for Connor. I have prayed for you and will continue to do so as the Lord brings you and Connor and your family to my mind.
Don't change a thing about your blog. You remind me of the King David the psalmist who was brutally honest in his writings and prayers AND he was commended by Jesus as being a man after God's own heart.
I can't speak for God but I imagine that if he put David's songs in the bible then it is okay to be honest about what is on your heart.
Even in your "down" times... even in your grief I have seen your faith!
I have no idea who was critical of your blog or why.. but I just couldn't keep silent on this one!
You have been an encouragement to me. The decisions you have made regarding the rest of the family blogging is very wise. It's biblical. Anything else would be legalistic.
Bravo to you! May God continue to lift up your soul as you trust in Him.
Thank you!! God bless you!
Sincerely in Christ,
Diane Boucher
Amen, Diane, if David, a man after God's own heart, could have great moments of despair I think that God understands when we do too.
Eric, even in your despair I believe that you are a witness to those around you. If for no other reason than the fact that you show a determination to hold on to your faith when it takes every bit of strength to do so. That is really a great testimony.
It is so nice to have big brothers, isn't it? Being the oldest sibling, I always find myself very protective of my younger brother and sister.
One thing, I had commented on the last two posts, but for some reason, they are not there. I must not have typed in the word verification correctly. :)
Two-hundred, nineteen days. I cannot even begin to understand this journey that God allows you to go through daily. Even when I am having the worst of my days, it does not compare to yours.
We as believers, know in our hearts that God has everything under control. We know there is a reason, but even in that "knowing," there are moments when we want to say, "this stinks!" Those moments keep us up at night, make us despair, and even depress us.
You're human. I appreciate your honesty in this journey your family has been on. If you constantly had the "Pollyanna" attitude through this, then I believe people could not relate to you. People can relate to this, even though the trials are different.
Go ahead and vent, cry, be happy, encouraged! Tell us whatever emotion you are having at the time. No one will ever know what you are going through, even if the situation is very similar, because we all know that you are truly trusting God and still believing that He is good.... all the time.
Every time I get on to post a comment, I sit and try to think of how I can be an encouragement to you and your family. Sometimes, I do not even want to post for fear I will say something wrong. I do not know all the verses to encourage you. I do not even have the words. Telling you that I am praying for you all, just seem so repetitive. I ache for you. I ache for Cherie', Joelle, and especially Connor. I just want to "will" him back to health!
I really believe that if God gave me a choice, I could walk again normally without pain or Connor could walk again, I would choose Connor. I want you all to never have a heartache again, but I know all I can do is pray for you. There is not a day that goes by that I do not think of your family.
Anyway, I think I rambled on enough. I pray that God gives you a wonderful day, and hopefully, I will type in the word verification right this time. :)
Exhaustion begets depression. Sometimes when it feels like you have too much to do or too many responsibilities, your weaker spirit has a chance to pull you down. Now that Connor will be receiving care giving assistance, Eric and Cherie will be able to recharge much more than has been possible the last 218 days.
Eric, Cherie, Connor and Friends, I encourage you all to give thanks for this new assistance. It's a belssing that we all know will recharge the family during this season in their lives.
Donna Hamilton
Tumwater WA
Eric is right on when he says we cannot feel the writers emotions on these blogs. Some people are fearful of judgment for their opinion and rightly so by the backlash of comments.
I hope my comments have been honest and helpful and never mean spirited... But we are all sinners struggling through this treacherous river of life.
My devotional today said:
Such a one is like a tree planted near streams; it bears fruit in season and its leaves never wither, and every project succeeds. Psalm 1:3
Nourished by the river of life, the fruit we produce is “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23)
Our fruits will show slowly at first, but with His grace they will be produced. This blog is one way we can help each other grow the best fruit...
Kathleen
Wow - what an amazing, selfless thing to say, Chelle! You bring tears to my eyes.
God is good - all the time. He brings the right people into our lives at the right time with the right words to say...
eric,
blog what you want, it's your blog. sci is exhausting, frustrating, depressing with very small and seemingly insignificant moments of light.
Our friends with a son with a c4 injury would tell you that the first year is the hardest. it does get easier, especially with caregivers and help. sleep improves much.
continuing to pray for all of you.
terry
Dear Eric, Cherie, Connor and Joelle,
Praise God for your honest and open comments. We have been going through our own despair and troubles and I cannot tell you how many times your honesty has helped me through my own lack of faith and periods of doubt. Our sermon this last Sunday was based on Psalm 35:17-22. Even before reading the blog, I thought of your family and prayed for you; so I will share this today in the hope it will encourage you a bit . . .
"The Lord hears His people when they call to Him for help. He rescues them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the broken hearted; He rescues those who are crushed in spirit. The righteous face many troubles, but the Lord rescues them from each and every one. For the Lord protects them from harm - the Lord will redeem those who serve Him Everyone who trusts in Him will be freely pardoned."
We still pray for you each and every day. Blessings, Jann and Bill Hija
One of the things I enjoy so much in this blog is the honosty of your feelings. Your struggle with your surrondings and the fact that your willing to post all your experiences. I do not know if I would have the strength to do what you do!
I can almost feel your day to day chalanges in your writings as they are so intense.
Please don't get discoraged, this is where I go to learn, cry, laugh and pray.
God is great!
D Rieman
Brentwood, CA
P.S. I have a hard time posting who I am, I do not understand the choices. I do not have a google account, I do not know what an OpenID is and I do not have a URL.
Mr/Mrs/Ms Rieman,
It's my big brother Brad who likes all the identity choices on the bottom - I'm not quite so particular! I only ask that a name is associated with the post, just like you did by adding it at the bottom of your comment. That's completely satisfactory!
Thank you as well for your words - I'm glad you're journeying with us, and I covet your continued prayers.
Eric
And I don't know what an Open ID is, either!
Williamson family, we continue to read the blog each day and are glad to pray for what you ask us to pray for. We so appreciate your honesty and knowing what's on your hearts and minds, no matter what it is. We're here with you. Hope to see you again soon.
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