Day 69 - August 23 - Still in Fresno
Well, we're still in Fresno. We have no idea what Monday will bring, but at least we're not moving precipitously this weekend. As far as I can tell, maybe Christ is returning on Sunday and I don't need to worry about all this at all. That's about where I'm at in the process, anyway - "Lord, come quickly". 8-)
Connor's foot was moving a bit yesterday under stimulation - when Cherié ran her finger down the arch of his foot, his toes would curl up like it tickled! He wasn't controlling it, but it responded to touch, and it happened while a doctor and a physical therapist were looking on. Also, Connor spent a solid hour on the voice valve, doubling his previous best! He was pretty worn out afterward, breaking out into a dripping sweat during the last half of the session. But he did very well, and that was while also on the near-normal O2 and pressure settings. His pressure has been lowered to 4 (2-5 is "normal")!! His diaphragm, however, still needs to work on its own for him to be able to be weaned from the ventilator.
We awoke this morning oppressed and despairing. Our prayer this morning was "Lord, we know you're in control, but we are in chaos. We know you love us, but we feel abandoned. We have no hope in doctors, or facilities, or procedures - You are our only hope. But we feel hopeless; we feel rejected; we feel thrown to the wolves and left to die. Your word says that Your mercies are new every morning. We need new mercies today."
It amazes me how pathetically weak I truly am. But hey, at least God's strength is perfected in weakness!
Please continue to pray for discernment regarding placement and facilities. Also, to help you all understand the process better, we're in step two of this process (I don't really know how many steps there are in this dance, but there are at least five!). The ICU was step one - stabilize him. Step two is the hospital, where we are now. Step three will be the place where Connor is weaned from the ventilator and brought to sufficient health that he can begin rehab. Step four will be the place where he actually receives rehabilitation services. Step five, of course, is home.
Valley is a "step four" place, which is why they rejected Connor earlier - he's not ready for step four. We're trying to find the right place for Connor to go for step three, all they while praying that God would make it all unnecessary. We have come to the conclusion this morning that, if we can't be at or near home, then there's no real difference in location, and so we will want the absolute best care we can arrange for the boy. This will mean taking him, and us, away from our friends and support system, and the further we go, the harder it will be. Does that mean packing up, selling our home, and moving the household away? We don't know. We also have a beautiful daughter who is being radically affected by this. She's been a rock, but we know the waves crash over her too. Please continue to lift us up before the throne - our family is drowning in the flood, crying out for help to the only One who can save us.
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posted by Eric Williamson @ 9:18 PM
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21 Comments:
Isaiah 41:10
Don't be afraid,for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand.
Isaiah 43: 1,2
First, the praise.
For foot movement!
For sweat!
For Connor beating his world record on the voice valve.
For 02 pressure in the normal range.
For a weekend of time to breathe a bit.
For our almighty God, ruler and creator of all things, all-powerful, who is in control.
For the faith of the Williamsons, who pray to You while in chaos and despair and confusion.
For their testimony to all of us in the world.
Now, we continue our faithful prayer requests on behalf of Connor, Eric, Cherie and Joelle.
Lord, you know what is needed in this situation. You know how our faith is always tested so You may shine even brighter through Your servant. Bring Your path clear on Monday, Lord, for the very best facility and medical servants to help Connor through step three. We trust You to guide each little step. Your power shines through the many baby steps Connor has taken on his road to recovery from near death. Give Eric, Cherie and Joelle rest and protection this weekend and strengthen them for what lies ahead in Your plan next week.
In Jesus' name we pray.
Amen
Heavenly Father, we stand together as brothers and sisters in your name, as we lift up the Williamson family before your throne of grace. Lord, you do indeed know what their needs are. We pray Lord that you will grant them at least a small vision as to what your plans are for them, to give them hope and not dispair. Their love for you Lord is so evident and their steadfast trust and faith continues even in the midst of these trials. We thank you Lord for their testimony and we pray that you will continue to be honored and glorified through each step of progress in Connor's healing. Lord, we thank you for your faithful presence even though there are times in our flesh that we cannot see your plans as clearly or feel your presence as much as we desire to. In your holy name, we pray Amen.
The following are some suggestions which you may or may not have done already.
1) Contact the insurance company and ask for a case manager on their end. This is usually someone in the medical field such as a nurse. This is different from your case manager at the hospital.
2)Start an appeal with the insurance company regarding Conner's denial to the Saratoga FAcility ASAP. I am pretty sure you do this by contacting the insurance company and asking how to appeal the answer. If they say you can't, ask for a supervisor
3)Asking the Fresno hospital for an outline of what Conner will need upon discharge (kinda like a physician's discharge notes or summary). Present this to the Saratoga facility and ask if they can accomodate those specific needs and which ones they can't. If they can do all of them, present this in the appeal to the insurance company.
I hope this helps a bit. Remember, that you are the client with the insurance company and you do have rights. I find it hard to imagine that there are not other facilities closure to your home in the Silicon Valley.
The Derendinger Family
San Jose, CA
Isa. 43:2,3 - "When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. For I am the LORD thy God, the Holy One of Israel, thy Saviour..."
Dear Eric,
I feel confident that when I say no one sees you as being "pathetically weak." The courage and strength that your family has shown throughout this ordeal is more than most folks would be able to endure. I know that I speak for myself specifically. God has given your family the gift of faith and He will honor you for your continued faith and trust. His mercies are renewed each day in that you are able to put one foot in front of the other and continue walking this journey. When you are feeling frail, this is where the rest of us, your brothers and sisters in Christ, as well as those who may be observing in the background, lift you up by the elbows and walk along side you. You will never be alone, no matter how many physical miles will come between you and those you love and who love you. In times when you may be feeling this sense of hopeless abandonment, God sends you words of wisdom and wise counsel. I believe that you have just received these words from your friends, The Derendinger Family. I was personally struck by the practical wisdom that permeates each suggestion that was made. I encourage you to "Go for it!"
May God continue to grant you His grace and wisdom. Continuing to pray in His name for you all.
We're praying for continued faith for you as you go blindly forward trusting only in God; it appears God is not giving an ability to see anything clear at this point; we pray for you.
I saw communications about facilities in Fulsom or Oakland until Connor is off the respirator and would be able to move to Saratoga. You mentioned that a benefit of Fulsom is it being out and away from traffic & chaos with likely RV options. We both know the serenity of living in MH and I think the chaos of SF area would be worth avoiding especially if you like the facility in Fulsom and they believe they can have Connor off the respirator in 30 days ~ then on to Saratoga (barring insurance issues, etc.)
Love & prayers,
Patty for the Trapps :o)
Eric and Cherie,
This was taken from the Valley Med Rehab website. If Connor needs the best respiratory intervention, this is the place to be. They will have the most up to date technology and most skilled respiratory therapists around. It is worth calling another meeting with valley to discuss what they might have for him there, if you all should so choose.
"The High Quadriplegic Program provides around-the-clock comprehensive respiratory management on the SCI Unit for ventilator dependent patients. Patients with spinal cord injuries may be placed into the High Quadriplegic Program by hospital physiatrists. This program specializes in invasive and non-invasive respiratory technology. In the High Quadriplegic Program, pneumobelts and phrenic never pacer experiences are extensive. No pulmonary emboli have been diagnosed in the last 370 consecutive patients admitted to this program."
I know your head is spinning with all these recommendations, but if valley provides the best respiratory therapy around, they would be the closest step 3. Just because they said no before does not mean you cannot change their minds if you choose to push.
Respecfully, and always In Him,
Kathleen Froess
Good morning, dear friends...
I'm away all day and evening so I won't be able to check back in until tonight. But I wanted to leave a message saying I love you and continue to pray for you.
I praise God for movement -- ANY movement!! I'll be praying that the involuntary movements of his foot become voluntary.
I praise God for Connor doubling his previous best time on the voice valve!! In the spirit of the XXIX Olympiad, Connor gets the GOLD MEDAL! I'll be praying that he increases that hour of voice time.
I praise God for dripping sweat!! As we've discussed in previous posts/comments, sweating below the injury level isn't normal and is a good sign. I'll be praying that Connor continues to sweat and that it would indicate healing.
I praise God for near-normal O2 pressure settings!! I'll be praying that God takes that down one more notch today -- from 4 to 3.
Other things I'll be praying about today:
- hiccups
- a working diaphragm
- movement in other areas of his body
- lifting of oppression and despair
- God's peace, which surpasses understanding
- a clear sense of God's presence WITH you
- encouragement by an unexpected source
- spiritual refreshment
- rest
- clear direction for Step 3
"For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom His whole family in Heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge -- that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." (Eph. 3:14-21)
Much love,
Jenann
In Touch, Charles Stanley
Weekend August 23-24, 2008
Waiting on God
Psalm 33:20-22
We put our hope in the Lord. He is our help and our shield. In Him our hearts rejoice,for we trust in His Holy Name. Let your unfailing love surround the Williamsons, Lord Their hope is in you alone, In Jesus Name, Amen.
Because our God is an all-knowing, wise, and loving heavenly Father, we'll always benefit when we follow His schedule. However, waiting on Him can feel difficult.
Throughout the Bible, we read of people who experienced delays before God acted on what He had promised. In the following examples, notice how patience and obedience led to blessing:
Noah was told to build an ark because a flood was coming. When the rain did not arrive, his neighbors must have thought him a fool. Yet Noah trusted God and continued to work (Gen. 6:12-22).
After reluctantly agreeing to approach Pharaoh about releasing the Jewish slaves, Moses learned it would take a number of warnings before God's plan would be fulfilled (Ex. 7:1-7).
Jesus' disciples were told to wait in Jerusalem until they received the promised Holy Spirit (Acts 1:4).
When I was a young boy, I learned the importance of patience. After having me plant some seeds in her garden, my mother explained what would happen. First, green sprouts would appear, and then the plants would develop. I kept a close watch on that area, but nothing seemed to be happening. One day I decided to dig up those seeds to see if there was any progress. I found no plants at all. My impatience did not produce any fruit.
The Lord has a plan for each of us, and the timing of every detail is always right.
Seeking God, through prayer,
In Downey
Hi Cherie, Eric, Joelle and Connor, I am praying for you all and send my Love. Hope you you got my email and text message I sent you yesterday about the other LTAC hospital in san leandro that I found. I hope something good will follow it is closer then folsom for sure. I love you guys! xxoo Sara
Eric, I continuously marvel at your faith! Please don't feel that your faith is weak because if it is, then mine is certainly almost non-existant.
And I am in absolute wonder as to how many people are holding Connor and all your family up in prayer. Your faith has opened your heart, your hurting for your son, your human needs to a whole world-wide community of people who are reaching out to you; supporting all of you with loving petitions to our Lord on behalf of Conner. Not all of us are so open, nor able to share our hurts and consequently we don't have that brotherhood of support. What a shame. Maybe that is what I am learning - I don't know. I only know I am grieving along with you for your son, whom I have never met. But I know my Lord has Connor in the palm of His mighty hand - and He will not let go!
Since day one of this watch, Connor has come a long way and I am priviledged to be a part of his community of support. I am praying for God's will to be done and that all of us who have become members of this community of the "Connor Watch" will see the miracle of complete healing for Connor.
In His Love,
MT
C'ville
Continuing to pray for full restoration for Connor. To God be the glory, great things He has done! Waiting, expectantly, for the Hand of God to move for Connor & the family. God Knows Best. We are lifting you up.
In His Grace,
KC, MH
Praying for God's provision, direction, and peace to be given in abundance to your entire family .
Danny & Laura Slavich
Louisville, KY
YES! Ask Valley Med for a new evaluation! Connor has come a long way since they saw him. His heart is stable and he's eating!!!
It's the best place. Ask for reviews, re-evaluations, appeals.
The Prayer Warriors are behind you in the battle, asking God to open the hearts of the people in charge of the best place for Connor.
BTW, the friend that told me she knew a family that was originally told no at Valley Med and then they pushed through that had a family member with a C1 injury.
Dear Eric & Cherie,
I am lifting you both up in prayer today. While praying for you both, I had such an overwhelming joy creep in regarding the fact that you are Connor's parents! Thank God that you raised your children with a knowledge, love and fear of our Lord! How I praise God for you - even in the middle of such oppression and despair, you are crying out to Him. Can you imagine a family that does not know God trying to find a way through this chaos - it's beyond comprehension.
So much of my day today has been spent praying for your situation. So many of us are praying... I see a big circle, surrounding you all, hundreds deep!
Waiting to see God's direction...
Sandi
Gilroy
The post that outlined steps to take was great. I just want to add one more. I know you have already talked to your case manager at the insurance company. But you can also talk to the medical director, which will often work. You need to advocate for what Connor needs, which includes closeness to friends and family and an uplifting place like a children's facility.
Abraham Lincoln once said something that sort of parallels Mt.6:34. "The good thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time."
We pray that God will show you each day what He wants from you on that day. In the midst of all the decision making you are faced with at this time, it can all but paralyze you. Trust God to bring about what He knows is best for all of you together. He is the Omnipotent, Omniscient, Omnipresent God. Praise His Holy Name.
I love the first paragraph of this post! I can totally relate. I've had days that all I could pray for was "the rapture" :-)
On other "dry" days, I would get a little creative and pray, "Lord, amplify the voice of the saints in your ear". It's kind of like saying, "Yeah...what she said!" but at least then, I felt like I had prayed.
I believe that God gives us the "Grace" to walk through our own trials and He gives others the "burden" for prayer over it.
Rest in knowing that many people have your situation covered in prayer. I also pray that you are able to fully receive the Grace that God has for you in getting through this.
I'm with Kathleen and others that mentioned Valley Med Rehab. I am going to be praying SOOO hard for this to happen and then possibly Saratoga.
If at all possible, you need to be close to home, close to your friends, close to church family, and all your support group.
And then of course your daughter Joelle. She has all her friends here, church, work, etc. You need your family and friends here. So this will be our prayer, that this will happen.
But of course, God may have other plans and "I guess" we need to be open to those plans. But man is that ever hard sometimes! But if that happens, God will give you a way to cope, I know He will.
But.... I'm still going to pray for Valley or any other place closer to home for you!!! That is your hearts desire, and God knows that, so that is our prayer!!!
Besides, you have this verse to lean on. Psalm 37:4-5 "Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, Trust also in Him, and He will do it."
Keep trusting & praying!
We're praying our hearts out!
Kim
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